Dear ibarfly (Advice Thread)

[Wil Munny]

Free advice from famous author Dr. ibarfly jones, including dating advice for singles, love advice, and guidance on relationships. Also icludes personal advice and opinion column for questions about marriage, family, teens, divorce, dating, neighbors, work, relationship problems for the nasforum.net readers.

"I am here for you, chuuuch"

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Virtual Flower]

Do you believe in spanking? Kids, not adults.

[T-rade]

I was thinking; Do you consider yourself a wanna-be Dr. Phil Lifted?

[Wil Munny]

Do you believe in spanking? Kids, not adults.

Sometimes a kids needs a beatdown to know who is boss. Just like a wifey sometimes. I don't think physical disciple should be used first. But as a parent you do what you go to do to raise a child.

[Wil Munny]

I was thinking; Do you consider yourself a wanna-be Dr. Phil Lifted?

No, however if you continue with this dumb ass questions, I'll cut you.

[T-rade]

No, however if you continue with this dumb ass questions, I'll cut you.

So you're saying you are the get-to-guy for emo's? And not a helpful dude who answers questions, like Phil Lifted?

[STAINLESS STEEL]

BOOOOOO!!!! BOOOOO!!!!

Where's Dr. LIFTED at??? Who is this fake doctor???

Where's your pHd???

BOOOOOOoooo!!!!

[Wil Munny]

I need some advice on how to get rid of a stalker, lol.

[ibadeen]

I need some advice on how to get rid of a stalker, lol.

Easy.

1. Cut a hole in a box,

2. Put your junk in the box,

3. Make your stalker open the box and get all R. Kelly on his ass.

[Wil Munny]

that's funny.

[STAINLESS STEEL]

I need some advice on how to get rid of a stalker, lol.

Nah, you jus need advice on how to post pictures of decent lookin women.

[Wil Munny]

All shapes, colors, and some sizes are appealing to me.

[Bre]

Rip off.

[T-rade]

I told you "doc" yous a dr. phil lifted stan...

[Incog_Negro]

Seems to be a stan to me.....lol There can only be one Dr.. on the boards. They need to to duke it out. ha ha

[ibadeen]

Bootleg.

[Wil Munny]

Seems to be a stan to me.....lol There can only be one Dr.. on the boards. They need to to duke it out. ha ha


two sentences, one with lol and the other with ha ha, you need some rehab.

[STAINLESS STEEL]

two sentences, one with lol and the other with ha ha, you need some rehab.

Ye, it's so true. Good diagnosis.....but it's still Dr. Phil LIFTED>>>>>>>>>>Dr. Ibarfly

[kormega]

don't hate
I think Dr. Ibarfly can give some advices

[Incog_Negro]

Yeah what kind of Dr. asks for advice??? You should know how to get rid of a stalker....

[Precious_Love381]

how do you get your boss fired for sleeping with a co-worker without the boss finding out?

Theres my question

[Wil Munny]

how do you get your boss fired for sleeping with a co-worker without the boss finding out?

Theres my question


That's easy. You don't involve yourself with relations that don't concern you. That's why workplace violence is on the rise. But if you are more concerned about correcting the environment there and not so much with getting him fired...HR or EEOC

below is more info that will show you this can be view as sexual harrassment...

http://www.eeoc.gov/types/sexual_harassment.html

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Precious_Love381]

lol you're funny well actually my boss is the woman that hired me and to make a long story short, alot of my friends/co-workers are getting in trouble left and right, and theres tons of drama I dont feel like typing out, but somebody found an email the boss wrote to one of the doctors in my office and hes married. So some of my girls are trying to get her fired then she can stop abusing others when she aint doing right, I was curious as to tell my girls since you're a "doctor" and all. Thanks anyways

[Wil Munny]

lol you're funny well actually my boss is the woman that hired me and to make a long story short, alot of my friends/co-workers are getting in trouble left and right, and theres tons of drama I dont feel like typing out, but somebody found an email the boss wrote to one of the doctors in my office and hes married. So some of my girls are trying to get her fired then she can stop abusing others when she aint doing right, I was curious as to tell my girls since you're a "doctor" and all. Thanks anyways

Read up on EEOC and you and your co-workers could be victims off sexual harassment.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Precious_Love381]

how doctor??

[Wil Munny]

how doctor??
Well after you finish reading you will understand that an adultress or unprofessional relations in a work place can cause a hostile enviroment based on the fact there is sexual favoritism taking place. Read little butterfly, read.

[Precious_Love381]

I dont want to j/k

thanks for this I'll read up on it, you're gonna be my new play uncle lol

[Sicktress]

Dear Ibarfly,

Is it hard being in an interracial relationship? How is it dealing with stares, or has all that calmed down nowadays?

[sinematic]

?????????

[Wil Munny]

Dear Ibarfly,

Is it hard being in an interracial relationship? How is it dealing with stares, or has all that calmed down nowadays?

It was harder in the begining because I felt like the fact I am a very devoted husband I wish I had taken past relationships with girls a lot more seriously. My mom probably would agree with that.

Instead I was all about hitting it and running. So to a certain degree (very small) I have a little remorse, but then again I am just happy where I am right now and wouldn't change a thing. The looks I get are not my problem. It's their problem with the fact they can't find a man to treat them right. That man isn't going to be me since I'm married.

The stares are almost gone. It's a different world now. But when I do get them I couldn't care less. I have family to worry about. Not some person who doesn't pay my bills, watch my kids, or has to deal with my crazy perspective on life.


http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg
If you are asking about yourself. I would tell you like I would tell anyone else. If you find happiness and love, don't let it walk out your life. Life is way to short.

[sinematic]

amen to that brother

[Sicktress]

thanks :)

[Wil Munny]

thanks :)

I hoped that helped. I wasn't sure if you were just asking me a general question or asking for yourself. Either way I hope I was able to answer your question.

[Patricia]

Dear ibarfly,

Recently, an old friendship of mine has been slightly rekindled. I am questioning whether it's wise to keep talking to this person again, because of his relationship with his wife.

A little background (warning, i'm verbose):

We met about 6 years ago. We both kind of liked each other, but he moved to Georgia after about a year of us being friends, so nothing ever happened. We visited every once in a while, just as friends, but eventually we kinda started talking about a long distance relationship.

He planned to come see me and we were going to see how things went and possibly start the whole long distance thing. He had sex with this chick (who he's now married to) the day before he was supposed to come see me. I wasn't really down with that, so I told him nahhh.

We remained friends for a while, but he, very stupidly, told his wife "I think about her when i'm with you." So, obviously, she's not a fan of me. I stopped talking to him, because I didn't want to cause problems in their relationship.

So we didn't talk for a few years and he just recently called me up and we chatted a bit. He's talking about hanging out, because he's gonna be in town in July.

He and his wife have been having problems again, which i'm not the cause of at all, but I don't want to cause any more problems by hanging out with him.

But at the same time, I think it's extremely retarded for her to get mad about us just hanging out.

Should I just not make the attempt at friendship again, out of respect for the wife. Or should I still be friends with him and let her deal with her own childish insecurities?

Thank you for your help.

-p[dot]

[Wil Munny]

;92500']Dear ibarfly,

Recently, an old friendship of mine has been slightly rekindled. I am questioning whether it's wise to keep talking to this person again, because of his relationship with his wife.

A little background (warning, i'm verbose):

We met about 6 years ago. We both kind of liked each other, but he moved to Georgia after about a year of us being friends, so nothing ever happened. We visited every once in a while, just as friends, but eventually we kinda started talking about a long distance relationship.

He planned to come see me and we were going to see how things went and possibly start the whole long distance thing. He had sex with this chick (who he's now married to) the day before he was supposed to come see me. I wasn't really down with that, so I told him nahhh.

We remained friends for a while, but he, very stupidly, told his wife "I think about her when i'm with you." So, obviously, she's not a fan of me. I stopped talking to him, because I didn't want to cause problems in their relationship.

So we didn't talk for a few years and he just recently called me up and we chatted a bit. He's talking about hanging out, because he's gonna be in town in July.

He and his wife have been having problems again, which i'm not the cause of at all, but I don't want to cause any more problems by hanging out with him.

But at the same time, I think it's extremely retarded for her to get mad about us just hanging out.

Should I just not make the attempt at friendship again, out of respect for the wife. Or should I still be friends with him and let her deal with her own childish insecurities?

Thank you for your help.

-p[dot]


Seeing the dude wouldn't be a smart thing to do unless three things were to happen.

1) Your husband knows
2) She knows
3) And they are cool with everything you to say or do

If you don't have all these actions in play, drop it. Ask yourself if this was happening, but it was your husband talking with an old girl friend... Would this be cool with you? I hope this helps.


http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Patricia]

My husband knows.
I don't know if he'd tell his wife.
My husband would be fine, again, not sure about his wife.

And I really wouldn't care if my husband was hanging out with an old friend. This guy and I never dated. We never even kissed.

I wouldn't/haven't cared when my husband hung out with old girlfriends, but i'm not insecure and retarded like most women.

[ibadeen]

This going pretty well. Wow.

I think I'll go get in trouble so that I'll have a problem for you to fix for me. Where did I put that bottle of vodka?

Seriously, I like this thread.

[Wil Munny]

;92509']My husband knows.
I don't know if he'd tell his wife.
My husband would be fine, again, not sure about his wife.

And I really wouldn't care if my husband was hanging out with an old friend. This guy and I never dated. We never even kissed.

I wouldn't/haven't cared when my husband hung out with old girlfriends, but i'm not insecure and retarded like most women.


Interesting. Well, if he doesn't tell his wife then he feels he has a reason to hide the continued conversations with you. If you don't mind, then it is what it is. Just keep in mind that it may not be fine with his wife. Sure she doesn't mean anything to you, but nevertheless she is married to this other guy. He needs to reconcile whatever issue he has with her before he can even consider starting any kind of relationship outside his own. Like I said, if you don't have all three actions it could get messy.

And he isn't just an old friend. He was a person you were trying to determine if the next level of your relationship with him could happen. This is the guy who's wife wasn't happy before about your "friendship." Just think about it.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[sinematic]

Tot why ask him when you can ask me? He aint no real doctor

j/k lol

yo how can I make a million dollars by next Friday without robbing a bank, stealing, or murkin suntin??

[ibadeen]

P.Dot, Listen to the Doc.

I wouldn't go near this guy. This is how innocent people catch hot lead.

[ibadeen]

Tot why ask him when you can ask me? He aint no real doctor

j/k lol

yo how can I make a million dollars by next Friday without robbing a bank, stealing, or murkin suntin??

I'd go with Male Prostitute.

[Patricia]

lol.. yeah, if he doesn't tell her or if she's not okay with it, I don't think i'll be hanging out with him.

[ibadeen]

;92521']lol.. yeah, if he doesn't tell her or if she's not okay with it, I don't think i'll be hanging out with him.

Personally, I think the guy is just looking for trouble. He knows better, but he's looking for an excuse to slip up and begin the process of rationalizing why he shouldn't be with his woman. I wouldn't be surprised if he had feelings for you or some weird bitch shit like that. Cut that sucker off.

[Wil Munny]

Tot why ask him when you can ask me? He aint no real doctor

j/k lol

yo how can I make a million dollars by next Friday without robbing a bank, stealing, or murkin suntin??

I think I can help you. First in order to make that kind of money you have to have money. Hopefully we have cleared away any and all illegal means and plan to make a million in a week the legit way. Ok, now that we have decided that we can look at our options.

1) You could buy lottery tickets
2) You could learn about horse racing bets
3) Betting on a professional sports team in Vegas
4) Play a card or dice game at a casino

These are basically your only options. So you do have a chance but a very slim one if you want to cash out in seven days. In order to do this you will have to have at least 750K for the horse for you could bet on a favorite. Probably 500K if you want to win by betting one a professional team that's a sure bet favorite. A card game and the lottery would be the hardest and you might need about 999,999.99 to make a million in a weeks time. I hope this helps. Good luck!!!


http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[sinematic]

lol ibadeen you crazy but real

I just wanna see what the good ole doc is gonna say...

[sinematic]

LMAO! why am I feelin this thread too tho? lol

nah I aint got that kind of money saved, but appreciate the advice

*goes back to Vegas this summer to tear up Treasure Island*

[Sicktress]

I hoped that helped. I wasn't sure if you were just asking me a general question or asking for yourself. Either way I hope I was able to answer your question.


It was for me and it did help. I'm glad people are more accepting nowadays..

[Wil Munny]

LMAO! why am I feelin this thread too tho? lol

nah I aint got that kind of money saved, but appreciate the advice

*goes back to Vegas this summer to tear up Treasure Island*

Sorry, sometimes sound advice is not the advice people really want to here. However, at least you know that it is possible, just not probable. And the risk are huge if you can't lose the money you need to make the money you desire.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Patricia]

Personally, I think the guy is just looking for trouble. He knows better, but he's looking for an excuse to slip up and begin the process of rationalizing why he shouldn't be with his woman. I wouldn't be surprised if he had feelings for you or some weird bitch shit like that. Cut that sucker off.

I know he has feelings for me still, but he also knows it's never going to happen.

The Good Doctor adds before leaving....

Never would be if you don't ever see each other. Otherwise there is no absolute.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/closed.jpg

I will be back tomorrow. Please leave a message and I will get back with you as soon as possible.


"I don't know everything, but I do know somethings." Dr. ibarfly Jones while appearing on Oprah, Feb 07.

[sinematic]

pdot if you do go, keep a baby 22 in yo purse, and a razor under yo tongue he sounds suspect

[sinematic]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/closed.jpg

I will be back tomorrow. Please leave a message and I will get back with you as soon as possible.


"I don't know everything, but I do know somethings." Dr. ibarfly Jones while appearing on Oprah, Feb 07.

ROFL!!!!

*tears sign down, and breaks in doc's office and steals all his books with advice*

[Patricia]

pdot if you do go, keep a baby 22 in yo purse, and a razor under yo tongue he sounds suspect

lol!

He's harmless.

[sinematic]

lol dag, you could take him huh? hes a pussy type of dude? j/k

[Patricia]

Haha, no.. i'm sure he could kick my ass.

He just wouldn't hurt me.

[sinematic]

okay well just take some pepper spray just in case he goes VA Tech insane lol

[Patricia]

Haha, I don't know how I conveyed the idea that he was weird and/or crazy. He's a normal guy.

[sinematic]

you didnt, Im just messin wit cha

[T-rade]

Nah sine, she needs some hairspary, if not treated properly and fast enough, that shit will burn your eyes away, almost happend to a friend of mine, he was lucky, but got -5,5 on both eyes

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/OFBlogo.jpg

I'm open and available for guidance on whatever issue that troubles you.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[ibadeen]

Hi Doc...

Question: In general, I am a very honest person, but I'm beginning to wonder what approach I should take at the club with the ladies. Here's the rub, the mack game is above average, however, I have a very young looking face (I still don't grow facial hair!) and eventually, most of the ladies will ask how old I am. Some are cool with the fact that I'm in my very early 20s, but there's also the group that aren't cool with that. You also have to account for the fact that more often than not, a 25 year old woman in the club is at least 29 on her ID. Should I lie to these ladies or keep plugging away in the hope that shit will work itself out? This issue is cutting my stats by a good 30%. Thanks Doc!

[Wil Munny]

Ibadeen, I will folllow up with you and have an answer in the next hour. Thanks for stopping by.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[ibadeen]

Doc...keep in mind that I never have the intention of dogging any of these ladies out. More often that not, the reason why I stop messing with a lady is from her end.

[Wil Munny]

A few issues need a resolution first, before you consider “to keep plugging away.” First, why are you looking for women at the club? The fact that you are in your early twenties in the year 2007, you have to be aware of the fact that STD’s are on the rise. You also need to understand that the foundation to how you live the rest of your life is beginning formed this very moment, and the is a 89% chance that each relationship form after meeting a girl in the club will fail. You are heading down a path you might regret later.

Maybe instead of focusing on picking up chicks at the club you should focus on how to make yourself more attractive to the type of person you want in the life long term. I am not saying give up chasing ass. Continue to doing that, but at the same time you should think about the energy you are using to pursue relations that most likely will not last.

Do not worry about looking young. That will be a blessing not to far down the road. Worry about acting young. Lying to girls will only hurt you in the end. That being said you could still make use of the tools of deception if you feel you must. However you it wisely and make sure you use it on women who are at least one hour travel time away from you. In addition, keep an eye out for women that do not possess transportation. No having transportation and the use of deception can increase the fun you are looking for. However, it can come with a deadly price. The other woman could be using deception too. So be vigilant because karma is a mofo.

Last thought… each chick you sleep with has the potential of being your baby’s momma. So beware of the one-night stands with chicken-heads. And do what is best for you in the long term, because a bad decision could screw up your life plans for 18 plus years. There is a saying out there. "Be careful of the company you keep, but be more careful of who you let in your bed."

I hope this helps. If you need additional help, ask away.


http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[T-rade]

I'm starting to like you Doc, you take this kinda seriously, so here's a serious question from me:
Earlier today I arranged a meeting with my ex (you know the girl who dumped me after only 2 days) Saturday for icecream in hopes of her easing her hangovers. She has, as i've stated in the post about her dumping me) that she now has a new boyfriend, and she also know, that i still like her, was it a wise move of me?

[Wil Munny]

Send me an email with the post about the break and your relation PM. Also if there are any adfditonal information you want to add please insert it into that email too. Your question is not unlike the question many people are looking for answers too. My suggestion may not just help you, but also a fellow forum member.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[T-rade]

I just sent it all via PM

[4anybody...]

"Be careful of the company you keep, but be more careful of who you let in your bed."

Good saying, I'll start using it. Wow, seems like u really are dishing out good relationship advice.

Let me ask you another one. I work as a receptionist and there is a really good looking woman that since January has kept coming up to me to talk about her ex husband, telling me about her life and her son. She's really outgoing and that really turns me off, but I'm nice to her because she seems like a good person. Then she started bringing pictures of herself to show me and started saying we should go out. Without me asking she gave me her number 2 weeks ago and came up to me a few more times saying we should go out. I have started to see over these 5 months that she is a potential good woman to get to know. So after the last time she talked to me, which was last Tuesday, I decided to call her. I called her on Wednesday and left my # and haven't heard back from her since. To me, that's weird because of all the attention it seemed like she wanted. What's going on? Should I call her again or just erase her number like any girl I don't want to know?
Now, I'm not too worried if I never talk to her again, but I'd like to make sure I do this right.

[Wil Munny]

Good saying, I'll start using it. Wow, seems like u really are dishing out good relationship advice.

Let me ask you another one. I work as a receptionist and there is a really good looking woman that since January has kept coming up to me to talk about her ex husband, telling me about her life and her son. She's really outgoing and that really turns me off, but I'm nice to her because she seems like a good person. Then she started bringing pictures of herself to show me and started saying we should go out. Without me asking she gave me her number 2 weeks ago and came up to me a few more times saying we should go out. I have started to see over these 5 months that she is a potential good woman to get to know. So after the last time she talked to me, which was last Tuesday, I decided to call her. I called her on Wednesday and left my # and haven't heard back from her since. To me, that's weird because of all the attention it seemed like she wanted. What's going on? Should I call her again or just erase her number like any girl I don't want to know?
Now, I'm not too worried if I never talk to her again, but I'd like to make sure I do this right.

I can give some guidance on this tricky situation. Give me sometime though. I will be logging off to hit the golf course. Tee time is in 30 minutes and you can best believe answering you questions will be to main focus while I practice my golf game. Expect replies around 8PM EST. Which is five hours from now.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[T-rade]

Good saying, I'll start using it. Wow, seems like u really are dishing out good relationship advice.

Let me ask you another one. I work as a receptionist and there is a really good looking woman that since January has kept coming up to me to talk about her ex husband, telling me about her life and her son. She's really outgoing and that really turns me off, but I'm nice to her because she seems like a good person. Then she started bringing pictures of herself to show me and started saying we should go out. Without me asking she gave me her number 2 weeks ago and came up to me a few more times saying we should go out. I have started to see over these 5 months that she is a potential good woman to get to know. So after the last time she talked to me, which was last Tuesday, I decided to call her. I called her on Wednesday and left my # and haven't heard back from her since. To me, that's weird because of all the attention it seemed like she wanted. What's going on? Should I call her again or just erase her number like any girl I don't want to know?
Now, I'm not too worried if I never talk to her again, but I'd like to make sure I do this right.

By outgoing do you mean open?

[ibadeen]

A few issues need a resolution first, before you consider “to keep plugging away.” First, why are you looking for women at the club? The fact that you are in your early twenties in the year 2007, you have to be aware of the fact that STD’s are on the rise. You also need to understand that the foundation to how you live the rest of your life is beginning formed this very moment, and the is a 89% chance that each relationship form after meeting a girl in the club will fail. You are heading down a path you might regret later.

Maybe instead of focusing on picking up chicks at the club you should focus on how to make yourself more attractive to the type of person you want in the life long term. I am not saying give up chasing ass. Continue to doing that, but at the same time you should think about the energy you are using to pursue relations that most likely will not last.

Do not worry about looking young. That will be a blessing not to far down the road. Worry about acting young. Lying to girls will only hurt you in the end. That being said you could still make use of the tools of deception if you feel you must. However you it wisely and make sure you use it on women who are at least one hour travel time away from you. In addition, keep an eye out for women that do not possess transportation. No having transportation and the use of deception can increase the fun you are looking for. However, it can come with a deadly price. The other woman could be using deception too. So be vigilant because karma is a mofo.

Last thought… each chick you sleep with has the potential of being your baby’s momma. So beware of the one-night stands with chicken-heads. And do what is best for you in the long term, because a bad decision could screw up your life plans for 18 plus years. There is a saying out there. "Be careful of the company you keep, but be more careful of who you let in your bed."

I hope this helps. If you need additional help, ask away.



Thanks. I think you should just stick to this thread, cause you kinda suck at all the other ones! You are excellent here though.

I suppose that I'm lucky in that I tend to gravitate towards women who have their own shit going on. I can honestly say that I've avoided the chicken-heads. The problem is that I don't do a whole lot of things that would lead me to hang out with beautiful women and I like my job way too much to dip in that pool. When I meet girls at the club, more than half the time, I pass on the one-night thing with the hope that I can turn into something a little more concrete and that's a problem in itself.

Anyway, thanks for the advice and keep at it.

[4anybody...]

By outgoing do you mean open?

Yeah, open, among other things.
She's the kind of woman that laughs a lot--it's not a weird laugh, but I just don't like that she does it alot. She's also very kino, touches people alot when she talks. And the fact that she started telling me private stuff about her right away.

^^
other people do this, because I am an easy-going dude at the center desk of a place w/ high traffic, just it's rare that any of them keep coming back, because I don't feign interest--I try to relate, tell a joke, or act annoyed--i don't fake it. So most don't come back, and most aren't hot-ass hawaiian chicks.

Also, when I called her, I want to make it clear that she didn't answer and i left my # on her voice mail.
thanks beforehand for the advice

[T-rade]

^^^
How can you be turned off by people being open to new people?

If i were a girl you would hate me. I can jump around like a frog in the shopping street in copenhagen without feeling embarrased

[GodsonAcrossTheBelly]

wut brand of cd player for a car should i buy?

[4anybody...]

^^^
How can you be turned off by people being open to new people?

If i were a girl you would hate me. I can jump around like a frog in the shopping street in copenhagen without feeling embarrased


lol
u sound like a funny dude. But that's not what I'm talking about--cuz I can act fun and outgoing when I'm out on the town--and I like when girls do too IN THAT SETTING. But not in a work environmnet

And also this chick is like 30, not 18 (or however old u are).
I'm 25 and I generally date chicks 27-33 and they are generally more mellow than younger girls

[Wil Munny]

I'm starting to like you Doc, you take this kinda seriously, so here's a serious question from me:
Earlier today I arranged a meeting with my ex (you know the girl who dumped me after only 2 days) Saturday for icecream in hopes of her easing her hangovers. She has, as i've stated in the post about her dumping me) that she now has a new boyfriend, and she also know, that i still like her, was it a wise move of me?

After reading a little more about this situation I have come to two conclusions...

1) This girl either did not want to hurt your feelings or she just isn't very honest.
2) You got to learn how to play it cool.

I think you showed your emotional cards way to earlier. Next time wait before you leap into profess your feelings to a girl. As for meeting her, I think it is ok. Because it should be clear to you she isn't the person for you. Plus she has a man. Move on. If not all you will be doing is getting a girl that will most likely dump you for another guy.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

Good saying, I'll start using it. Wow, seems like u really are dishing out good relationship advice.

Let me ask you another one. I work as a receptionist and there is a really good looking woman that since January has kept coming up to me to talk about her ex husband, telling me about her life and her son. She's really outgoing and that really turns me off, but I'm nice to her because she seems like a good person. Then she started bringing pictures of herself to show me and started saying we should go out. Without me asking she gave me her number 2 weeks ago and came up to me a few more times saying we should go out. I have started to see over these 5 months that she is a potential good woman to get to know. So after the last time she talked to me, which was last Tuesday, I decided to call her. I called her on Wednesday and left my # and haven't heard back from her since. To me, that's weird because of all the attention it seemed like she wanted. What's going on? Should I call her again or just erase her number like any girl I don't want to know?
Now, I'm not too worried if I never talk to her again, but I'd like to make sure I do this right.


It doesn't seem like there is any chemistry between you two. Or at least from you. FInd this out as soon as possible. The last thing you want to do is waste your time and hers.

Another thing to consider why she hasn't called is that something may have come up important in her life. Death, family issues, medical, work, some many things in life can distract a person. You just need to find out why you were put on the back burner.

Just call her and ask if everything is okay. This should ease your mind on the subject and should clue you in if there is a future or not. Then the rest is up to you to decide if there is a reason to try make more of a connection between you two.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

wut brand of cd player for a car should i buy?

The year and model would help me answer this better. But just on the face of the question, I would suggest an in dash dvd player. These player are excellent for watching movies while wifey is shopping at the mall and the fact all dvds read mp3's 4.7gb worth of music is better than the 700mb that a cd-r gives you. I hope this helps.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[ElCount]

I been trying to fix my relationship with my moms for a while now, but seriously the woman can be so selfish, not willing to accept fault, and only sees things one way which is more often than not, a very narrow-minded perspective that faults anything but herself for anything negative. EVerytime I spend too much time with her or get too close, we end up fightin again or something hectic happens and I'm reminded of all the reasons I hate her and just wanna throw in the towel and keep moving in my own direction. But I know her death will come inevitably one day and I want us 2 have the happiest times 2gether b4 I have 2 bury her when the time comes, but i can't see that happening with the type of relationship we have. what are some things i should consider?

[Wil Munny]

I been trying to fix my relationship with my moms for a while now, but seriously the woman can be so selfish, not willing to accept fault, and only sees things one way which is more often than not, a very narrow-minded perspective that faults anything but herself for anything negative. EVerytime I spend too much time with her or get too close, we end up fightin again or something hectic happens and I'm reminded of all the reasons I hate her and just wanna throw in the towel and keep moving in my own direction. But I know her death will come inevitably one day and I want us 2 have the happiest times 2gether b4 I have 2 bury her when the time comes, but i can't see that happening with the type of relationship we have. what are some things i should consider?

First, ElCount you have to understand there is nothing wrong with your mother. She is acting or is precieved by you in the exact manner most men see when a woman is driving them crazy. Is she really all those things you described, probably. But none of that matters because she is your mom. If she just drives you crazy be thankful. It could be worst. She could be stealing from you, smoking your herb, or sleeping with your best friend.

You are in a great place with your relationship with your mom. You still love her and want to make it work. I went through the same thing with my mom. We went two years not talking. All I wanted was us to be cool. She thought I was asking too much. In the end I decided to move on, except her for her faults, and let go of my issues concerning her. The end results... She is my best friend.




http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/closed.jpg

I will be back tomorrow. Please leave a message and I will get back with you as soon as possible.


"I don't know everything, but I do know somethings." Dr. ibarfly Jones while appearing on Oprah, Feb 07.

[4anybody...]

thanks, doc

[T-rade]

Thanks doc...

And 4any, i understand, i can see what you mean now...

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/OFBlogo.jpg

I'm open and available for guidance on whatever issue that troubles you.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[AL-JABR]

............../´¯/)...........(\¯`\
............/....//..............\\....\
.........../....//................\\....\
...../´¯/..../´¯\.........../¯`\....\¯`\
.././.../..../..../.|_......_|.\....\....\...\.\..
(.(....(....(..../.)..)..(..(.\....)....)....).)
.\................\/.../....\...\/................/
..\................. /........\................../
....\..............(............)............../
......\.............\.........../............./

[ibadeen]

^^^^^^
hehehehehehe

[Wil Munny]

So Ra, what is really on your mind? Just ask for help. State mandated pyschiatric care is only suggested when a person is a real and present danger to self/others, without treatment will continue to suffer mental distress and deterioration of ability to function independently, and unable to make a rational and informed decision concerning treatment.another person? Your giving the finger suggests that to a certain degree. If you want to talk just ask. My service is free of charge to nasfourm.net members.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[AL-JABR]

So Ra, what is really on your mind? Just ask for help. State mandated pyschiatric care is only suggested when a person is a real and present danger to self/others, without treatment will continue to suffer mental distress and deterioration of ability to function independently, and unable to make a rational and informed decision concerning treatment.another person? Your giving the finger suggests that to a certain degree. If you want to talk just ask. My service is free of charge to nasfourm.net members.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

ACUALLY TO BE HONEST THAT WASN'T REALLY MENT FOR YOU. I WAS JUST SEEING IF THAT WOULD WORK IN THE FORUMS IF I COPIED AND PASTED IT IN HERE. SINCE MOST OF YOUR TREADS ARE BULL SHIT I FIGURED I WOULD TEST IT OUT IN HERE. LOL!!

[AL-JABR]

BUT SINCE YOU ASKED. HERE IS MY PROBLEM. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE WORLD THAT YOU LIVE IN AND YOU SEE THAT THE SHIT IS A WASTE DUMP FULL OF BULLSHIT. 90% OF THE PEOPLE ARE FAKE. I HAVE TO BE FAKE JUST SO GET ALONG WITH THEM INSTEAD OF BEING MYSELF. PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS SCARED TO WORK WITH YOU BECAUSE THEY ARE SCARED YOU ARE GOING TO OUTSHINE THEM. THE COPS FOLLOW YOU AND PULL YOU OVER EVERY TIME YOU LEAVE YOUR HOUSE AND YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING ILLEGAL. SHIT ALROUND THE PLANET IS FUCKED UP AND YOU REFUSE TO ACCEPT IT? THEN YOU HAVE PEOPLE THAT HATE YOU OR THINK SOMTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T SMOKE, DRINK OR EAT MEAT. WOMEN HATE YOU BECUASE YOU DON'T HIT(KICK GAME) ON THEM AND THEY KNOW YOUR IN A RELATIONSHIP. YOU GET IN TROUBLE FOR BEING TRUE AND NOT FAKE. YOUR FRIENDS SO CALLED FRIENDS ARE ALWAYS TRYING TO OUT DO YOU INSTEAD OF WORK WITH YOU. THEIR GOES SOME STUFF FOR YOU. PEACE.

[Wil Munny]

BUT SINCE YOU ASKED. HERE IS MY PROBLEM. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE WORLD THAT YOU LIVE IN AND YOU SEE THAT THE SHIT IS A WASTE DUMP FULL OF BULLSHIT. 90% OF THE PEOPLE ARE FAKE. I HAVE TO BE FAKE JUST SO GET ALONG WITH THEM INSTEAD OF BEING MYSELF. PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS SCARED TO WORK WITH YOU BECAUSE THEY ARE SCARED YOU ARE GOING TO OUTSHINE THEM. THE COPS FOLLOW YOU AND PULL YOU OVER EVERY TIME YOU LEAVE YOUR HOUSE AND YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING ILLEGAL. SHIT ALROUND THE PLANET IS FUCKED UP AND YOU REFUSE TO ACCEPT IT? THEN YOU HAVE PEOPLE THAT HATE YOU OR THINK SOMTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T SMOKE, DRINK OR EAT MEAT. WOMEN HATE YOU BECUASE YOU DON'T HIT(KICK GAME) ON THEM AND THEY KNOW YOUR IN A RELATIONSHIP. YOU GET IN TROUBLE FOR BEING TRUE AND NOT FAKE. YOUR FRIENDS SO CALLED FRIENDS ARE ALWAYS TRYING TO OUT DO YOU INSTEAD OF WORK WITH YOU. THEIR GOES SOME STUFF FOR YOU. PEACE.

It is pretty simple. It seems that you are suffering from what is commonly know as the "poor me syndrome." If this is how you truly feel you have branded the ideal that you are the victim to deeply into your psyche. I would suggest to stop focusing on this issues that are beyond your control. Cops, your so-call friends, and women that have no business being involved in the life.

You heart seems to be in the right place, now just get your mind there. Quit focusing on all that is wrong and what you are doing right. Control your actions and thoughts and let only your inability to perform affect you.

If you want more help we would have to tackle each issue by it's own merit. What I just gave you was an overall point of attack to better yourself. If you need more specialized attention, we can discuss my rates.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[AL-JABR]

LOL AT RATES

[The Last Mohican]

Hey Ibarfly,
im new at the Nasforum, just letting you know that this thread is great,
i aint have any problems just yet, but ill call at you if any arise.
peace

[Wil Munny]

Thanks!

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/closed.jpg

I will be back tomorrow. Please leave a message and I will get back with you as soon as possible.


"I don't know everything, but I do know somethings." Dr. ibarfly Jones while appearing on Oprah, Feb 07.

[Patricia]

Dear ibarfly,

I have explosive diarrhea.

Please help.

Thank you,

p[dot]

[The Last Mohican]

^^^
p[dot] are you racist?
you aint seem to have any Black dudes in your sig.

[sinematic]

lol man you thought she was racist off of that?

shes white so its all good

but even if she was black I dont think mad white dudes in her sig would make her racist lol

[AL-JABR]

LOL AT THAT TOO. THAT'S HER PAROGETIVE. I WOULD HAVE ALL BLACK CHICKS IN MY SIG THAT DON'T MAKE ME A RACIST DO IT.

[Patricia]

lmao!

How did I know somebody was gonna ask that?

I actually wanted Pharrell in there, but I couldn't find a good color picture of him that I liked.

But.. I tend to be more attracted to white guys.

Racist? Sure! That's why i'm on a black man's message board.

[LIFTED]

dear ibarfly,

what in the hell were you thinking when you took my song and tried to remix it? i tried to give this thread a few minutes of my time to read and i stopp'd my gandering at about page 3 when i seen repeat'd requests for my services, as opposed to your new venture. as a fellow moderator of this wonderful forum, im giving you a bit of advice, its good to be creative, but its even better to be original. if you desire to continue this service, so be it...but deep inside ibarfly (i REFUSE to call you doc or mr!!!) we both know that you will never reach the plataeu of my success and receive the admiration n respect from fellow posters.

sincerely,
dr. phil lifted




p.s. have a good day

[Wil Munny]

dear ibarfly,

what in the hell were you thinking when you took my song and tried to remix it? i tried to give this thread a few minutes of my time to read and i stopp'd my gandering at about page 3 when i seen repeat'd requests for my services, as opposed to your new venture. as a fellow moderator of this wonderful forum, im giving you a bit of advice, its good to be creative, but its even better to be original. if you desire to continue this service, so be it...but deep inside ibarfly (i REFUSE to call you doc or mr!!!) we both know that you will never reach the plataeu of my success and receive the admiration n respect from fellow posters.

sincerely,
dr. phil lifted




p.s. have a good day


Okay, I never knew about you had a practice until i opened mine. Good luck with your continued service to the members of nasforum.net. If you have any questions feel free to ask me.

Have a nice day and spend some more time on the board. Read the entire thread. It's pretty helpful.

Yours truly,

Dr. ibarfly Jones

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[ibadeen]

Okay, I never knew about you had a practice until i opened mine. Good luck with your continued service to the members of nasforum.net. If you have any questions feel free to ask me.

Have a nice day and spend some more time on the board. Read the entire thread. It's pretty helpful.

Yours truly,

Dr. ibarfly Jones



Don't be a lying sack of poo. You know what you did. The service is welcome, but stop fronting.

[Wil Munny]

I never read any Dr. Phil stuff. I have no reason to lie. I didn't know dude had a thread. I welcome it and maybe working with him in the future.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[LIFTED]

if we talk'n bout money baby, now we talk'n!

money on my mind, money on my mind, fuck bitches! fuck bitches!




i mean

i think ur lyin, dr phil lifted threads are certified classics.

[Wil Munny]

if we talk'n bout money baby, now we talk'n!

money on my mind, money on my mind, fuck bitches! fuck bitches!




i mean

i think ur lyin, dr phil lifted threads are certified classics.

LMAO, I believe a person lies to people that they fear. Since that isn't the case here; I don't know what else there is to say. You might want to continue reaching out to the people that respect and look to you for guidance. You seem to be popular. I wish you and your practice the best. Do your thing and I will do mine.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/OFBlogo.jpg

I'm open and available for guidance on whatever issue that troubles you.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

This is from a reader who wishes to remain unknown.

I am a very down to earth brother who happens to be earning a little bit more paper than most people I know. How do I prevent myself from being played by girls because I have it going on? I like to find a girl that is into me and not the cash.

Love me for me


Well you are going to always have women interested in what cash you are bringing to the table. You just have to make sure that is her main focus guiding her. A smart way to do this is.....

1) Never let her see you atm reciept
2) Don't talk about your salary
3) Use hotels because she doesn't need to see your crib
4) Down play your funds
5) Get her to pay for nights out or at least split the cost
6) Don't loan her money if she gets into a jam

If you do these things you should find out if the girl is into you and not your funds. I hope this helps.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

;93880']Dear ibarfly,

I have explosive diarrhea.

Please help.

Thank you,

p[dot]

In most cases of diarrhea, replacing lost fluid to prevent dehydration is the only treatment necessary. Medicines that stop diarrhea may be helpful, but they are not recommended for people whose diarrhea is caused by a bacterial infection or parasite. If you stop the diarrhea before having purged the bacteria or parasite, you will trap the organism in the intestines and prolong the problem. Rather, doctors usually prescribe antibiotics as a first-line treatment. Viral infections are either treated with medication or left to run their course, depending on the severity and type of virus.

Tips About Food
Until diarrhea subsides, try to avoid caffeine, milk products, and foods that are greasy, high in fiber, or very sweet. These foods tend to aggravate diarrhea.

As you improve, you can add soft, bland foods to your diet, including bananas, plain rice, boiled potatoes, toast, crackers, cooked carrots, and baked chicken without the skin or fat. For children, the pediatrician may also recommend a bland diet. Once the diarrhea has stopped, the pediatrician will likely encourage children to return to a normal and healthy diet if it can be tolerated.

I hope this helps. For more information go to The National Digestive Diseases Information Clearinghouse (NDDIC)
http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/diarrhea/index.htm

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[Wil Munny]

I created a myspace page for Dr. ibarfly Jones. I sent a bullentin out to my 857 friends on my other page and mentioned nasforum.net. Maybe some of them will sign up. I know they have visited before, but maybe we can get some more members.

[T-rade]

I wanted to ask something, forgot it when i saw lifteds sig.

And that raised two questions; Is that normal ... And is it Britney in it?

[kitty fur fur]

Free advice from famous author Dr. ibarfly jones, including dating advice for singles, love advice, and guidance on relationships. Also icludes personal advice and opinion column for questions about marriage, family, teens, divorce, dating, neighbors, work, relationship problems for the nasforum.net readers.

"I am here for you, chuuuch"

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

ha i just wanted to say i did check this out and it will take me some time to figure everything out and i think its hugh-larry-ass that you are giving advice on here.

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

(From the website)
Dr. Ibarfly Jones,

What is the man perspective on dating? I find it a little hard to jump back in the scene, especially when it has been over 7 years with that particular scene. Do men like it when they are perused, or do they like to make the move? I know it's all relative, but just the general feel.

Thanks,

Alice

I replied...

I am not sure if I can answer what the man's perspective on dating is because it is so diverse. Everybody is looking for different things. That's a tough one.

However, I can still offer some pretty good advice for you today. I think after getting back into the "scene" after 7 years, you need to understandin a few things. You are not the same person you were when you started that last relationship. So think long and hard about who you are now and what you want. The last thing you want to do is repeat past mistakes by not recognizing who you are today. Make a list of the qualities and attributes you are looking for in a partner. Of course make the realistic, don't say I want a rich guy. Instead say I want a guy that enjoys horror films. Instead of saying I want a guy over 6 feet, say you want a guy that makes me feel physically comfortable.

Be open to having your friends hook you up on dates. They see you in a way different light than you see yourself. Friends have a good track record with creating lasting relationships. So if it happen don't knock down the chance with the person. Give it a try.

Online dating also is something that might be useful. match.com and others site might be useful.

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

from a little flirtateous

Dear Dr. Jones,
I am married and like to meet new people online. Is it okay to be a little flirtateous with others as long as it doesn't go further and we never meet in person?

Signed, a wife who doesn't want to piss off her husband again.

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Back into the mix after 7 years

Dr. Ibarfly Jones,

What is the man perspective on dating. I find it a little hard to jump back in the scene, especially when it has been over 7 years with that particular scene. Do men like it when they are perused, or do they like to make the move? I know it's all relative, but just the general feel.

Thanks,

Alice

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

from a little flirtateous

Dear Dr. Jones,
I am married and like to meet new people online. Is it okay to be a little flirtateous with others as long as it doesn't go further and we never meet in person?

Signed, a wife who doesn't want to piss off her husband again.

Well a little flirtateous, if you husband was upset once by this he might be even more upset if you go down that road again. That of course depends how this issue was resolved the previous time. A marriage is only as good as the couple allow it to be. If there are actions working against the success of the marriage those actions need to be pushed away.

Now if you feel your need for the attention from others is very satisfying then you might want to explain that to him. Maybe a compromise can be worked out. If you can do that then the act being flirtateous only is acceptable.

Also saying that it wont go further and you'll will never meet is possible but not likely. The only stay proof way of ensuring that to happpen is not to even go down that path.

I hope this helps.

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Back into the mix after 7 years

Dr. Ibarfly Jones,

What is the man perspective on dating. I find it a little hard to jump back in the scene, especially when it has been over 7 years with that particular scene. Do men like it when they are perused, or do they like to make the move? I know it's all relative, but just the general feel.

Thanks,

Alice


I am not sure if I can answer what the man's perspective on dating is because it is so diverse. Everybody is looking for different things. That's a tough one.

However, I can still offer some pretty good advice for you today. I think after getting back into the "scene" after 7 years, you need to understandin a few things. You are not the same person you were when you started that last relationship. So think long and hard about who you are now and what you want. The last thing you want to do is repeat past mistakes by not recognizing who you are today. Make a list of the qualities and attributes you are looking for in a partner. Of course make the realistic, don't say I want a rich guy. Instead say I want a guy that enjoys horror films. Instead of saying I want a guy over 6 feet, say you want a guy that makes me feel physically comfortable.

Be open to having your friends hook you up on dates. They see you in a way different light than you see yourself. Friends have a good track record with creating lasting relationships. So if it happen don't knock down the chance with the person. Give it a try.

Online dating also is something that might be useful. match.com and others site might be useful.

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

from a little flirtateous

Dear Dr. Jones,
I am married and like to meet new people online. Is it okay to be a little flirtateous with others as long as it doesn't go further and we never meet in person?

Signed, a wife who doesn't want to piss off her husband again.

P. Dot responds (from my website)

This really depends on the relationship you have with your husband. A lot of men can be extremely jealous and protective (a lot of the time they have the right to be). Random flirting with people you're probably never going to talk to is okay for the most part, but when you flirt with somebody over and over again.. like somebody you meet online, sometimes feelings can start to develop, whether you intend them to or not.

You need to know your own limits as well as your husband's. I don't necessarily think that you should keep it a secret from him, but you should not go to him and say "hey, I kinda wanna flirt with people online, do you mind?" Just let him know through general conversation that you do talk to new people online and the subject of flirting will probably come up on its own.

I think a lot of the time people confuse flirting with joking around and being nice. Let him know that you joke and you're nice, but you also let the people know you're married and there is no chance of anything beyond friendship.

What happens from there solely depends upon you and your husband's relationship.

[kormega]

Tell me please why I feelin aight after weedsmokin but damn fucked up even after a bottle of beer... What's goin' on wit' my head, doctor?

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Tell me please why I feelin aight after weedsmokin but damn fucked up even after a bottle of beer... What's goin' on wit' my head, doctor?

Alcohol is a diuretic, and drinking too much causes the body to dehydrate. It also causes the drinker to urinate more, losing more fluids from the body. It is the dehydration of the brain that causes the intense headaches of a hangover. The brain shrinks slightly when dehydrated and moves away from the skull.

Like any drug, alcohol introduces toxins or poisons into the body. In order to cope with these toxins, the body produces enzymes to combat them and remove them from the body. It is the amount of toxins one ingests that are the biggest contributors to the hangover.

Weed has a known "hangover effect" but it's effect is notinh like what is expeirenced after a hard night of drink.

I hope this helps.

[kormega]

fuck alcohol
I'm a weedhead

chea

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

can we still be friends?
If you are friends with someone, become good friends, and then have a falling out over a particular situation that you will NEVER agree about, do you think it is possible to ever be good friends again with that person? Knowing that this situation is hanging out there, people were hurt over it (other friendships were lost as a result), and you'll just never see eye to eye about it. Is it worth the effort to try to be friends with that person again? I'm just not sure and could use some advice.

Signed,
Don't know what to do

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Just wants to be happy

ok lets see what we get with this..

I have been married for 12 years. We have 2 lil girls.
The last 5 years its pretty much just been me and the kids. The hubby has had his priorities really messed up no matter how often I told him I was unhappy and needed his attention. At one point he was even interested in another woman and flaunted it. Several times I pointed out it bothered me. Mind u I was also pregnant during this time. The other girl wasnt really the issue the issue was he was not spending time with his family and we were feeling alone and neglected. We had always had an understanding that if either of us were interested in another party we would discuss it and decide from that point if it was ok between the two of us to go outside the normal boundries of marriage. Well he never did. I believe that whole heartedly. Early in our marriage we did experiment but only at his discretion and only with women. Anyway..in October I met a friend. We hit it off very well. He also thought I should leave my marriage. Not for his benifit but for my happiness. So after 3 months of goin back and forth in my mind about the vows I took I decided it i would leave. That was November. It didnt faze him . So in Dec I told him i was leaving now. This bothered him he informed me it wasnt fair he thought he had more time to fix things. In a month he had done nothing. Well we talked and he asked me to stay and let him try to fix the relationship. It is now 6 months later and nothing has changed except the fact that I have him as a complete shadow and he thinks I am entitled to no privacy because we are married. Now i am wanting to leave again but I want my husband and I to remain friends. I am very open about how I feel and about being unhappy but he keeps saying we took vows for better or worse and says now I am bailing due to the worse. I have dealt with it for 5 years already and am done. He isnt abusive to me or the kids in anyway. But am I just beign dumb or not? I am not happy and there are several reasons and I can come up with an excuse for everything he has done. But I am done giving excuses. Just thought Id see what ur imput would b on this.

thank you

Just wants to be happy

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Two men to choose from

Hello,

How would you suggest I deal with this. I've been seeing this great guy for about 1 month. I've known him
for a long time, and always had a crush on him, but only recently started dating. The other night, I went out on my birthday and ran into T. I've had a crush on T for years. he asked me to be his girlfriend. do I just take it slow and date both? the guy I've been seeing for a month, we havent really commited to anything yet. should I talk with him about seeing other people? I dont know.

Ok Dr. give it a shot.

N

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Two men to choose from

Hello,

How would you suggest I deal with this. I've been seeing this great guy for about 1 month. I've known him
for a long time, and always had a crush on him, but only recently started dating. The other night, I went out on my birthday and ran into T. I've had a crush on T for years. he asked me to be his girlfriend. do I just take it slow and date both? the guy I've been seeing for a month, we havent really commited to anything yet. should I talk with him about seeing other people? I dont know.

Ok Dr. give it a shot.

N

N, you seem to be in a very good place on the surface. But something tells me that guy number 1 has not done enough to make T a less interesting option. You might want to think about what each person has to offer and choose the one that can give it two you. This first guy is already a huge step behind because he has lost your attention. Is it because you are not clicking or is it because T is more of what you want. Decide and make everyone happier. A final decision might not work out for you, but at least a decision will be made. So whomever loses out on your love will be in a position to move on.

Dating both might be a very bad option.

Dr. ibarfly Jones

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Two men to choose from

Hello,

How would you suggest I deal with this. I've been seeing this great guy for about 1 month. I've known him
for a long time, and always had a crush on him, but only recently started dating. The other night, I went out on my birthday and ran into T. I've had a crush on T for years. he asked me to be his girlfriend. do I just take it slow and date both? the guy I've been seeing for a month, we havent really commited to anything yet. should I talk with him about seeing other people? I dont know.

Ok Dr. give it a shot.

N

A answered from my website...

Well, there's nothing wrong with "dating" them both if nothing is firmly established with numero uno...just be open with them both...

BUT...think about how you REALLY feel about Mr. Crush... is it just a crush? That's the b***h about infatuation...it hot in the beggining, but in a moth or 2 it's luke warm, at best. Are your feelings for beau #2 simply wanting the unattainable?

We've all been there before.

Just think it through carefully, you don't want to mess up a good thing for something that's just ok. :)

Do Pro's and Con's OR just answer yourself, which man is better suited to you? Do you even know Mr. Crush real well, or is it just that he's beautiful, charismatic, and fun? Beautiful can fade, Charasmatic can be an act, and FUN...well, you can have fun with almost anyone, doing the right thing.

Just think it through carefully before you decide.

A

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

Two men to choose from

Hello,

How would you suggest I deal with this. I've been seeing this great guy for about 1 month. I've known him
for a long time, and always had a crush on him, but only recently started dating. The other night, I went out on my birthday and ran into T. I've had a crush on T for years. he asked me to be his girlfriend. do I just take it slow and date both? the guy I've been seeing for a month, we havent really commited to anything yet. should I talk with him about seeing other people? I dont know.

Ok Dr. give it a shot.

N

Virtual Flower answered from my website...

T asked you to be his girlfriend, which usually means more than casual dating. If you're already looking at other guys, I don't think the great guy was meant to be. You could try to get the best of both worlds, but usually the person getting "the best" ends up being the loser in the end. Are there any emotions involved with either one? If so, follow your heart!

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

what should I do?????

Hey Doc,

Ex wife wants to maybe send my daughter (that lives with her) to boarding school. I want her with me but I guess I'm too firm of a parent. Her mom lets her do what she wants. How do I handle this? I want her with me not at some boardingschool.


Confused Ex Hubby

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

what should I do?????

Hey Doc,

Ex wife wants to maybe send my daughter (that lives with her) to boarding school. I want her with me but I guess I'm too firm of a parent. Her mom lets her do what she wants. How do I handle this? I want her with me not at some boardingschool.


Confused Ex Hubby

Relax, think about your words and make sure that the next time you talk with them you can articulate exactly how you feel about the subject without hurting anyone's feelings. Don't attack them because there could be a chance you are totally misunderstanding the situation. Try to offer an alternative that everyone can possible live with. Don't just say no. Have a valid reason to back up how you feel and make sure it is in the best interest of the little girl.

Dr. ibarfly Jones

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

what should I do?????

Hey Doc,

Ex wife wants to maybe send my daughter (that lives with her) to boarding school. I want her with me but I guess I'm too firm of a parent. Her mom lets her do what she wants. How do I handle this? I want her with me not at some boardingschool.


Confused Ex Hubby

T-rade answers from the website

Hey Mr. ex Hubby.

Did you think, that maybe the boarding school is your daughters idea? And if that is so, then you shouldn't stop her I am myself a boarding school child (though just for one year), and it has been the greatest year of my life

T-rade

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

I am looking forward hearing from you guys and gals!

[Dr. ibarfly Jones]

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/OFBlogo.jpg

I'm open and available for guidance on whatever issue that troubles you.

http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h101/ibarfly/askmike1.jpg

[vexed less]

Dr ibarfly i need mad help man...
since i was younger i been a fiend for jackin shit...
...about 2-3 years ago i used to rob houses... n recently been feelin the urge to start stealin shit again...
...the only reason why i stopped was because my girl asked me to... n she's the reason why ive paused to contemplate whether i should start back up agian instead of just jumpin back into it...
help me out Doc... should i get back in the B'n'E game or just shut the fuck up n listen to wat the wifey says...
hit me back
peace

[champ]

dear ibarfly why do you post a pic or vid of a fly as hell girly then go and cancel that out with a broad that is so god dam ugly, and you always postin white girlys too not nice white girls nasty pasty milky skinny ass ones